Yorkville

It's my last day in Yorkville, and I've been feeling some mixed emotions. I'm pretty much packed up, tomorrow's moving day. I just got engaged on Saturday, and Alexandra and I will be sharing OUR first apartment together in a few days - so things are definitely very exciting around here. But, I can't help but reflect on the past year with some uncertainty.

My move to Yorkville last summer was made for a simple reason. I was determined to live my life on the terms and in a method that were my own. It was the first place I could call MINE for as long as I can remember. No roommates or co-habitants like college and the years that followed. Yorkville symbolized a fresh start from a failed marriage, a way to break free of all those memories and create something new with Alexandra.

This apartment isn't anything all too special, a small ground-floor studio facing the street - no place for an air conditioner, a bit noisy at times, ok neighbors, 4" of counter space...but it became a home. My plan all along was only to stay here for a year, get myself sorted out, and as a bonus I was close to my girl's place. A year later I'm moving to a larger apartment, better in every way...yet I still find myself feeling a bit bummed I'm leaving this place.

I've done this moving thing a lot. I did the math the other day, and this will be my 20th permanent move in my 28 years. I'm so used to fresh starts, and be every definition this is another one...but why does this one feel different?

Truth is, I don't know. This apartment will remain a fond memory, but not one I'm going to cling to. I know better than to get too attached to where I've been, and all I can control is where I find myself in the present. Maybe it's in our wiring to miss where we've called home when we're setting off to someplace new.

You know, this kind of feels like when I left for college.